I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
I need a good reason NOT to eat this entire jar of nutella right now
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
Abby spilt her vodka all over the train's bathroom floor
WE'RE THE ONES DRESSED UP FOR THE LARGEST DRINKING HOLIDAY IN AMERICA WHO ELSE ON THIS TRAIN IS A SUSPECT FOR THIS SMELL?!
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
You used a fucking bud light like as lube last night. I'd get a UTI test like stat.
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
Threw up on break at work. That brings our collective tally to 9 times. We can never drink like that on a monday again
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