Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
The wedding was scheduled to start 5 min. ago. 20 people here so far, groomsmen in tees and jeans, catering by Costo. NO ONE OUR AGE IS READY FOR MARRIAGE!
There needs to be a newsfeed for phones... A list of all my drunken calls, texts, BBMs, new contacts, pictures sent AND received, all in chronological order.
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
Dental hygienist just pulled two flakes of glitter out. And asked me how i've been doing with the divorce.
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
I can't keep up with all the guys you're banging. I'm just going to start referring to them by city of origin.
Guess who just rode home in a cop car?! Your Fav flamingo
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
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