If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
you came home soaking wet, and when I asked where your umbrella was, you pulled it out of your bag and were so proud you kept it dry.
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
The things happening in my intestines right now should only ever happen at truck stops and frat houses.
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
I'm at a Tim Horton's and two girls just came in handcuffed to eachother
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
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