It took him longer to undo my bra than he lasted..
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
I've blown a few things in my day
guess what. just found out I had mono. no wonder alcohol didn't taste good on nye
You are in charge of making sure that her vagina explodes with joy tonight.
Something about a hand job in a car doesn't scream girlfriend
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
I totally left my shirt at your house. Also I think I high fived your cactus last night
I sleep texted my mom and asked her for a condom last night
I can't believe we really went to walgreens to use their cork opener, bounced and drank a bottle of wine in a sketchy corner...
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
I'm glad I date someone who likes the simple things. Sex, kittens, and McDonald's.
oh dont worry mom i am not sick my cough is from a recent increase in recreational drug use
that will happen
Randomize
