So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
he puts the penis in happiness.
as veruca salt said, "i want it now!"
uhh im not your indulgent father, stoned and im in the middle of making tacos. right now, tacos win
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
I love how understanding people are when they hear we first hooked up getting high and watching nature shows
can you put a coffee maker in the dish washer? yo know what, nvm i want to be surprised
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
I feel like I just gave a blowjob to a freight train.
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
Ate 3 ghost peppers and chased them with Everclear last night. Currently on the toilet cursing the universe and everyone in it.
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
Randomize
