She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
I just Tebowed the shit out of her.
Nice and you can't use "Tebow" in the place of every verb.
What do you need? A swimsuit and a liver of steel? What else?
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
We established that I was in 5th grade when she was in her final year of grad school. Her daughter is also in 5th grade.
He ran around the party with a broken foot/ankle with a gallon of Malibu yelling "it must rain coconut"
He called me piss drunk at 7:30pm while cooking bacon and said he was going to bed. I don't think he's taking it well.
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
Randomize
