hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
people are starting to question the shark bite story
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
I'm at the grocery store buying monistat and corn nuts. thank god for self check out.
Its pretty simple actually, if she texts me either Grr or Rawr it means she is horny and wants to bone. its a perfect system
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
Last night I said "I'm so glad you broke up with your lesbian soccer mom girlfriend" I don't remember how he reacted I just remember trying to pee in the woods
Shirley Temple died. We owe it to her to get dirty shirley wasted.
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
I blasted the Halloween Before Christmas soundtrack last night so my roommate wouldn't hear me having sex. Needless to say the sex got a little weird.
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
Are you drunk? You left me a voicemail at 5:59 AM of you making dolphin sounds.
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