Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
Why is half of me covered in green stuff that won't come off?
You stripper-danced on a light pole in the quad. It had fresh paint on it.
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
A girl at the bar is wearing green body paint instead of a shirt. Where are you?!
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
You were riding my three year old's train yelling, 'I think I can, I think I can!!'
I thought I could.
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
Sorry. My phone died in the middle of you explaining why we would never work as a couple. Whatever you were gonna say, I probably agree.
I had sex with him for the first time drunk, dressed in a toddler overall tutu costume, at 2pm. Horrible start.
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
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