Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
I bought a bottle of 100 proof for the storm. I am going to drink until I pass out. I'm taking bets. 1:30 pm is the over/under.
I'm going to buy you a pony but under one condition: you have to name it sarah jessika parker
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
The feeling I get when I hear beer bottles clinking must be what children feel when they hear sleigh bells on Christmas Eve
Rule travel - in 2s or put an ankle monitor on me, and maybe a shock collar.
I just put bronzer on my abs to snapchat nudes. If that's not going hard I don't know what is
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
My vagina doesn't have a refer a friend program. You don't get $25 for getting your friend to have sex with me.
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
Randomize
