I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
Baby momma caught me doing baby daddy in reverse cowgirl. She kicked me out and i have no clothes, come get me.
I hope you walked the shit out of that shame.
I was being carried out of the bar, but then my friend saw Pat who just got kicked out scaling the wall to sneak back in, so he carried me back in, sat me on the bar stool, and the bartender just let us all keep drinking.
Being persistent has its perks my friend.
what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
Ate lunch. Still drunk. Keep forgetting I'm in Texas but then I look around at the people and remember.
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
He wanted to have sex in a church because he has keys to it from court-ordered community service. WHAT IS STANDARDS?
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
He congratulated me by offering up free orgasms.. I told him I also had a birthday last month we needed to celebrate.. He was there in ten minutes.
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
I just borrowed porn from my middle aged mother. This is what desperate looks like.
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
Randomize
