He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
Skinny jeans should not be made in size 14. Then, it's just a lie.
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
I just had a vision of confetti exploding out of someone's vagina to the sound of air horns... I think that would be welcoming.
I like the way you think.
Heaven was on the 3rd floor and Hell was on the first. When the cop walked up he was confused as to who the noise complaint was for and wrote both apartments a noise violation.
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
you know that feeling on acid where you think the world stops just to fuck with you? That's what it felt like.
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
Because you failed to stop the wedding, now I have to be a homewrecker. My eternal damnation is on your head I hope you're proud.
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
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