Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
Some mysterious chinese delivery man dropped off 2 free egg rolls. Clutch
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
I actually have to watch Breaking Bad to make me feel better about my choices last night.
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
Diet Starts Tomorrow! Guy from McDonalds asked if I got a new car...
Flatmate got laid for the first time in 3 years. I'm baking a cake.
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
My New Year's resolution consists of less weekday hangovers, more sex, and more money.
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
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