is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
oh my god. separately texting an Allie and an Ally while drunk is hard, and I'm climbed 1/2 way up a bridge pier.
Just re-gained consciousness in the freshman girls dorm. Normally this would be awesome but I'm on the floor surrounded by chicks doing their homework. This makes me uncomfortable but I don't think they know I'm awake yet. If I b-line for the door can you come get me?
Thanksgiving. This year's theme: I am thankful that I still have a liver.
Just got a ride from a stranger while walking a mile home as it hailed with no coat. He asked me if I smoked, then said he just made some potent cookies and I could have one.
The cookie was what I originally wanted to tell you. Always say yes to drugs from strangers
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
I owe you an apology, I was appointed captain of this sexy fuckship and I fell asleep at the helm.
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
I'm literally the definition of crunk, sunburnt, and dehydrated. I'm going to die tomorrow.
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
I broke a rule
Which One?!
The one where I shouldn't sleep with your friends. I broke this particular rule 4 times.
You're officially the worst brother ever.
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
Randomize
