I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
Well you are. Awfully cute even. Like baby bunnies. And tiny, tiny penises. You know.
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
This was my thought process as I drunkenly ran home: Whoa! I'm going so FAST! Why don't I run EVERYWHERE! ALL THE TIME! Then I peed in a bush and passed out on the ground.
So basically you were a dog.
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
Idk how I even got accepted into college because literally the only things my brain ever thinks about are YouTube videos of baby animals and sex.
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
Say whatever the fuck you want about me, but leave my deceased cat out of it.
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
Randomize
