you know i think I know why you are single...because you are real cute but then you open your mouth and let words come out and all goes to hell.
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
I'm pretty sure my liver died in Reno and my intestines are doing hula hoops around my asshole. The bachelor party was that good.
You seriously knocked all the beer off the table, broke the beer pong table, broke the bar and kept yelling "you have to warn me first!" all because I wouldn't let you have another four loco
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
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