i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
i was mowing the lawn and found the coffee pot in the bushes
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
Just had a stripper snatch my glasses off my face with her ass
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
At what point did you think the cops were actually coming to hang out with us
You cant hold me accountable for my actions when im high.
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
Fucking someone because they own a lava lamp is like fucking someone because they have 20 dollars and no concern for their house burning down.
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
I’m a women at a strip club dressed as post Malone
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