i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
Just found two Xanax on the floor at the tanning bed. And yes, Im taking them...looks like going to get cancer is paying off
we went to the store to buy cookie dough and conditionally went straight towards the booze
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
how exactly do you say, "i only agreed to meet you for breakfast because i thought we could go to your place and fuck afterwards."
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
If I hear the phrase 'these unprecedented times' one more time I'm putting my foot up someone's ass.
Randomize
