Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
I have surprise drugs for everyone
My life now consists of 2 time frames. BV before vibrator and AD after death of my sex life.
I think it's safe to say taking shots on the way to the emergency room was rock bottom. We're going to need to think of ways to top that between now and next new years eve...
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
Randomize
