when I woke up the last searched thing on my phone was "how to make a fireproof dress" I need to stop drinking.
Dude!! Mom just asked me why you have 'boobies' hahaha
I hate my life
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
Slow dancing with the chandelier.
At IHOP. It feels weird and sad that your cleavage isn't here for me to try to toss paper wads into.
Now when you said you'd never sleep with me, did you really mean never on a Monday or never without handcuffs or a blindfold or never on a airplane or never without lots of booze? Cus never is a pretty strong word.
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
Next time I take edibles I'm getting chipotle to cater the event
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
I believe the only reason I am slightly functional right now is the leftover drugs in my nose that I keep sniffing
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
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