We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
NEWSFLASH - my freind is drunk and admitted that he hates having sex with dogs. should i help him or let him be??
He also left me a wonderful voice mail..... and is now asking me where the planters peanut guy is.
You should probably go find him.
not my fault. i got her to believe he wrote an oasis song. he still managed to find a way to make sure no girl ever gets near his penis.
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
Shes sitting on the front porch puking in to the pumpkin she just carved...in the rain. I guess pumpkin spice tequila shots wasnt our best idea.
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
You may now shotgun with the bride
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
at one point, you reached into your purse, pulled out a tampon, and proceeded to rub it on your lips like chapstick... that drunk
I feel like I had a successful night. I flashed the guy at the liquor store last night for 2 free tshirts and a giant redbull.
Randomize
