dude..why do i always have to pick up the kitty litter after you drink?
The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
My mom asked me to donate my child hood stuffed animals to the poor then I realized I was hiding liquor behind them. I told her I was too attached to them. She understood. Wrong in so many ways.
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
We have so much sex to catch up on
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
Nautical themed porn is also great bc someone usually wears a captains hat
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
He said he broke his back in 3 spots & my first thought was "there goes my booty call".
Did u have a 2nd thought
I need a new booty call.
Randomize
