if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK FUCKABLE IN AN ALL NEON SPANDEX JUMPSUIT?
Going to rent a magician for when I eat shrooms. How has no one thought of this?
we walked around the neighborhood with caution tape tied around our foreheads, making indian noises. I might have disturbed a crime scene to make a native american headdress.
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
I awoke this morning alone and naked in my bed I forecast my date later not going so well because I have three giant hickies on my neck there is a note next to my bed that looks a 3rd grader wrote it on my college acceptance letter
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
I'm gonna try Jim's breakup remedy this weekend.
Is that the one where you drink 3 cases of beer and rewatch as much WWE RAW as you can find? Or the one where you hookup with fatties on Craigslist?
I have a bottle of vodka wrapped in a leg warmer in my purse. This is what it takes to get through Christmas with my family.
I don't want to just break his heart, I want to dip it in liquid nitrogen and then smash it until it's powder and snort the powder
I’m sorry my lady boner messed up your mojo!!
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