the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
My dad just told the waiter to keep the pitchers coming until someone passes out.
Managed to discreetly puke out of a moving streetcar window, in front of no less than a dozen people. Nobody saw/said anything. I feel like a legit local now.
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
Told him I'd blow him in the bathroom. There was a giant window everyone was looking thru. He whipped it out n I burst out laughing n walked away. Even blackout drunk I set the bar high. You should be proud.
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
In the middle of pounding my asshole he stopped and said, "do you want to get breakfast after this?"
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
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