physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
It's like my ice maker knows when I wanna get drunk
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
Karaoke machines out. We're taking turns farting into the microphone. Shits going south fast. Definitely be awake when you get home.
I'm mortified. After he finished, he turned to me and said,"So, what did you think of my mom?" WTF Please tell me he was not wondering about that while he was going down on me!!!
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
We were getting breakfast he shit himself in the middle of ihop. Mid bite he just yells out o fuck.
There are peanut butter donuts now. We are playing with forces we can't possibly understand.
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
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