I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
I farted on Jack's balls last night. He got pissed and walked away cause he knew it was on purpose. I couldn't hold it in anymore.
Then I realized I was alone sitting on the bathroom floor brushing my teeth at 2am laughing to myself.
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
I'll hold a taco with my boobs for you
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
Tequilla is a sneaky bitch ninja that doesn't kick in until you least expect it. Then BAM! You're peeing in unconventional places.
Like my mom really needs to know just how non existent my sex life is
I'm so hungry and so lazy that I'm seriously considering ripping into that packet of cream cheese in my nightstand.
Randomize
