Im rethinking drunk tuesdays. Also rethinking ovaries.
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
you pissed in the sink and didnt realize it until it was time to wash your hands
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
He came so hard he burst a blood vessel in his eye. Do I have to take him to the ER? because I'm too tired for this shit.
I successfully convinced a drunk NDSU student that their school does not have a football team and another that they weren't in Fargo. I'm a dangerous sober shark in a sea of drunks.
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
There is a pool of ranch salad dressing in my purse...I know thats always been something you've wanted to try..so don't even act like you didn't do this.
Isn't it funny how we're still best friends after that incident with the old lady in the bathroom
You fucking bailed on me. But I love you still
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
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