Hey, could you leave the door unlocked? Keys seem hard right now.
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
My boyfriend just sent me flowers. I am now crying at the fact i fucked my fat neighbor. God please help me.
Meanwhile I am sitting on the couch with a 32 ounce rum and coke trying to decide if I'm too drunk to go get french fries.
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
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