She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
Fuck the gym. I just shaved m'cooch and my pants now fit looser.... Dont judge me.
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
Blonde 1 is sitting on the floor crying and blonde 2 is asleep with her face in the toilet. This isn't what I had in mind when they asked me back
i'm not sure when it happened but apparently now it's topless bar night, im wearing a leotard and everyone is looking at me like i'm cheating.
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
I found your pet lobster in the bathroom this morning. I went to return it to you but it escaped.
Hey I have your shoes. Do you remember shouting "Police brutality!" when the bouncer was kicking you out last night?
I gave him my yeast infection. HOW THE FUCK DOES THAT EVEN WORK?
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
My feet surprised me
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