I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
He tried to slow-dance with me in bed. IN BED.
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
You owe me $8 for the carwash I needed after you threw the salmon on my windshield.
You found me in the back room alone eating someone else's whole birthday cake with my hands then asked me if you could join.
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
Don't mind me. My boyfriend is carrying me because I'm broken not because I'm drunk.
It's not even 9:30 yet..
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
You think I'll get the "I used to stick it to your daughter" discount?
Why is everyone judging me for telling the cat a bedtime story?
He's ruined me. Do you know how frustrating it is to know I'll never find another guy as tall and handsome and rich with as big of lips & booty, and cock as him who also rims and takes me on tropical vacations and buys me all the cocaine.
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
Randomize
