can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
I changed the background on my phone to a picture of you so whenever I go to look at porn or text another girl I'll have second thoughts
Am I supposed to find that romantic?
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
There are drunk kids outside our building hugging that cop that's always on his bike as he's citing them for public drunkenness. It's not even 11 am.
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
Carson when you get home I want you to go downstairs and go into each bedroom and pick up the underwear and either throw it out or give it back to the people who own them. Look all over the room. Thank, Love Mom
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
He made me a flamingo drink and now I don't know why things are the way they are.
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
i got pulled over completely sober but looking like death. dick cop made me do a field sobriety test. he also said "no sober person could have 7 BK bags"
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
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