Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
Sometimes you've gotta crawl to stay concious
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
YOU HAVE PISSED AND FUCKED ON LITERALLY EVERYTHING IN MY HOUSE
Not everything, just a few things. And only a few times. The odds are really not all that bad when you break it down.
you’ve pissed every time you slept over. there’s no such thing as odds anymore. it’s guaranteed
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
Randomize
