Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
I just recognized Courtney in a crowded Trader Joe's solely by seeing her ass. In other news, I survived the first round of layoffs today.
I'm not sure which feat is more impressive...
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
I'm pretty sure at any given moment you could wring out my liver and get a couple of shots of jäger.
Exotic beer tasting at my apt right now and by that I mean I bought random beer and I'm drinking it on my balcony
Shitty. Well if it makes you feel any better I just had a toothless wasted crackhead in my bar who was mad because there are TOO MANY FUCKIN TREES in Nantucket.
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
I just spilled grey goose in my hair. You could say I keep it classy for the family Christmas parties.
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
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