Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
Afterwards she curled up in my dog's bed and slept there all night
How mad was your dog?
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
btw i have an angry voicemail of you yelling at me to get you a sandwich or die.
I won the karaoke contest at the bar last night, when they called my name i was doing blow off the toilet seat, i thought they caught me, i didnt even know there wasa contest
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
You know what, I don't care that I got too drunk and didn't make it into the boat party. If I had, I probably wouldn't have peed on you later while we soundly slept. I feel you need that in a best friendship.
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
whole 5th of capt = waking up in the shower after 2 hours and the whole house asking why i'm STILL in a towel. and me having nothing to say
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