Most awkward sex ever...
And im texting you in the middle.
you ate skittles off the table like a hungry hungry hippo. it was awesome.
Its official, drinking for 15 hours counts as a suicide attempt
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
I found your wallet in my underwear drawer......... Don't worry I don't plan on asking any questions
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
I saw that you sent me a photo and the first thing out of my mouth was "I swear if it's another photo of a dick poking out of a bubble bath"
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
Just ate 2 pieces of pizza in the shower.. New low or fuckin brilliant??
Fun fact: deep throating plus dehydration plus eating a lot of citrus = my throat is fucked. Metaphorically and physically.
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
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