just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
you lied vaginas dont taste like gold fish!
noo i said youre golden if her vagina tastes like fish!
It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
I was so scared, I actually heard my grandmother's voice in my head saying if I get pregnant, then my vagina will fall off. And then I'm going to die.
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
I feel like the way you told me you weren't pregnant was pretty anticlimactic.
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
We just banged and he's microwaving shrimp noodles and I'm eating tostitos alone in the dark this is why our relationship works
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
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