So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
I just want to let you know how hung over I am today and I fucked a girl in a kangaroo costume last night.
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
I may or may not vaguely recall punching you in the dick but it was a misunderstanding and I forgive you can we have make up sex?
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
I'm gonna fight the coyote
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
Randomize
