Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
We were on the balcony tossing jello shots to people passing below
When people said no i'd yell "i tried them i promise they aren't roofied!"
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
She said she liked strap-ons.
SHE WAS TALKING ABOUT SHOES, YOU ASSHOLE! YOU'RE THE WORST WINGMAN EVER!
Don't feel bad, we're professionals and we just housed burgers in burger king singing I believe I can fly
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
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