I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
The manager of the bar we were at the night before came to my house today giving me coupons. Apperently you and i won karaoke night which is a prize of 300 beer dollars. No idea what beer dollars means nor do i have any memory of doing karaoke but lets go back tonight.
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
That's true. There's really no bad time to take a Vicodin.
It is the Reeses peanut butter cup of pharmaceuticals.
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
Why is there soup literally in every orifice of my body?
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
Randomize
