She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
Someone please drive out to my house to bring me a beer.. There are some in the fridge but I just can't get up
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
Why does my jaw hurt?
I may have punched you.
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
How is your new roommate working out
We are drinking at the laundromat. And will probably have sex later. So...pretty good.
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
I ran into the marine at the grocery store. Its like my vag and his penis have this way of finding each other when I least want it.
Randomize