yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy
He's coming back with me for the week. It took me saying "I don't wanna drive myself home... I'm better as a passenger giving road head" for him to jump at it. Rack another one up for my magical openings.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
He sent me a 7 minute voicemail of him playing wonderwall on the acoustic guitar I'm not even kidding did he seriously think that would work
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
All I want to do is sleep. And If I'm not sleeping, I want to be eating or fucking. I'm pretty sure being pregnant has turned me into a dude.
There's still helium in the tank I found in the garbage outside the bar!
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
Randomize
