Shitting during a conference call is so empowering.
hey my socially awkward cousin is our designated driver for summer, we just have to put up with her wierd shit.
I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
he nicknamed his dick "too big to fail"
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
I just googled if crying burns calories
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
I sat on the ground outside wawa chain smoking and telling two strangers about my sex life. I also accepted Rick James Bitch and Celine Dion as their names.
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
this relationship shit is hard. like i'd like to be able to watch veep without him trying to dry hump me. also im drunk and its 11 am so
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
