Please, let me fuck your mom
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
And I just want you to know I got myself into this mess. I gotta get myself out. Plus, don't you only need one kidney?
What the hell man, you basically stole my girlfriend with a bucket of KFC.
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
Currently watching Zombie Sharks while high. This is why I love Shark Week.
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
Hahah I’ve never had someone stop me mid-coitus to tell me how amazing I am. Def ego boost.
I’m so poor I’m filling a flask with vodka and bringing it to the bar.
Randomize
