Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
A small child is toddling around the store, holding a coloring book and a shot glass. Thinking of you.
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
In case you were wondering, taking me to see beauty and the beast in theaters would totally get you an unsolicited sloppy beej in the parking lot afterwards.
You should probably take note of that and make it happen.
No, absolutely not. If you see that cunt, throw confetti or eggs at her.
That's a pretty extreme jump from confetti to eggs
And now I'm drinking leftover wine in the grad lounge because fuck my life
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
He is like the "hometown sweetheart", but a huge freak. Like "I'll come change your flat tire"....but then fuck you like an animal in the back seat.
So I spent all night thinking my bed was floating down a river and telling the cats to get on the bed because they were going to float away. Percocet is strong shit.
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
I need thought I would ever have to use the phrase "Don't fart on that Calzone".. Thanks for that
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
Did you fill my inhaler with tequila?
Yeah, so?
Wait... why were you finger painting at one in the morning?
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