I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?
I just had to google "How do I get semen stains off of drywall." I'm relatively proud of this
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
And then you'll find yourself a hot chick and leave me behind with nothing but my back fat to keep me company.
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
There's times when I just want to bottle my farts for later they're so insane.
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
I kept telling you not to give them blowjobs, but you kept screaming back, "it's okay, we're friends on facebook!"
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
Randomize