shit! I think I may have lost something in your car. Look for anything that can possibly belong to me, especially look out for a pair of pink panties in a ziplock. I lost my spare and you better find it before someone else does.
Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
At least you didnt end up topless in a Tina Turner wig singing cabaret tunes
Apparently, I woke up in the middle of the night, got up out of bed, dropped trou in the corner, squatted, and pissed on the carpet. When Eric heard, he thought it was the dog and started yelling, and I responded by saying "No no, its okay. It's me."
I told the girl in his bed not to bleed on his sheets like the last one.
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
The lady at Walgreens was all excited my pregnancy tests had a coupon.
I just want to let you know how hung over I am today and I fucked a girl in a kangaroo costume last night.
Nothing says I'll be 22 tomorrow like washing the vomit out of your hair at 4pm
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
Let's try finding a bar where there aren't people who want to hang me from a tree by my nutsack
He kept saying "Welcome to Indianapolis" over and over while we were having sex...because that's his hometown. I was scared and confused... I didn't know if I should have said thank you or what.
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
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