I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night.
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
If my birthday doesn't end with my panties hanging from a ceiling fan, I'm holding you responsible.
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
I'll meet you in hell with unlimited boxes of wine though
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
I've been trying to fall asleep with ice packs covering my vagina for the last hour... Sorry for being vulgar. I'm going to kill myself.
Randomize
