I am I'm going to have heart failure he's peed on my life.
the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
I can't believe you just became a stipulation in their divorce papers.
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
dude, my ass and shoulder hurt from that kayak last night... note to self: wood planks holding kayak from ceiling do not also hold up a human being
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
ACTUALLY FUNNIEST MOMENT OF THE NIGHT WAS WHEN YOU WERE TALKING TO HIM AND YOU SAID "WHEN YOU MEET ME IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE A LOT ANGRIER." And then he said "WHEN I MEET YOU IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE LESS DRUNK, HOPEFULLY."
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
I think drunk me is trying to kill me.
And you know what the worst part is? Because of him I can now relate to a goddamn Taylor Swift song. FUCK. MY. LIFE.
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
Randomize
