I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
I can't figure out how to get this beer bong in my carry on without airport security questioning me as it goes through the x-ray.
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
Totally sleeping on a bloodstained mattress tonight. I love life's little adventures.
I know he'd never cheat on me. It'd be like choosing Mexican tap water over Patron.
I bought something for you today. You'll love it.
What is it? Drugs?
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
It took 5 bourbons for him to handcuff and spank me and then he cried after sex. The men that like me are so unstable.
I always felt my time would come in the form of a tidal wave of whisky
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
Randomize