He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
more embarrassing than that time i showed up to class in my hoodie and leggings because i over slept, and then as i zipped my hoodie down i realized i didn't sleep with a bra on or a shirt
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
You passed out and I didn't draw a penis on your face. Sister of the year.
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
I ask for a dick pic and he sends a picture of Dick Cheney. Who does that?
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
Drunk. Come get me. Out front blue shirt.
Where are you? And you borrowed my shirt. I know what you're wearing. How wasted are you?
Hotel
WHICH HOTEL??
Randomize
