I love being friends with rich people. I get laid by association.
I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
you lied vaginas dont taste like gold fish!
noo i said youre golden if her vagina tastes like fish!
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
Woke up to pictures of me cooking wings with a blow torch.
The man who lives downstairs is fluent in Russian, and also a playboy. You should meet.
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
did you call me last night and say you were being kidnapped?
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
It's an interesting experience to pee while a bird meows at you.
You need to get out of the house more
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