Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
she made my bed before she left. i think i'm gonna keep banging her to get the housework done
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
You caught me at a bad time. I'm stoned enough that I'm ready to sleep but also not stoned enough that I wanna smoke again but also stoned enough to not wanna drive anywhere
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
He tried to grab your ass, but he grabbed my hand cause I grabbed your ass first. I saved your ass..literally. Your welcome.
one of my coworkers asked me if I was PMSing today...... excuse me sir, but it is none of your business as to what my uterus is or is not doing right now. fucker.
and yea, I'm PMSing.
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
Randomize
